Heather's Inbox

Meet Robert Dean Burlison II . He's a bit of an angry man with ties to the mafia and a history of murdering women. I like him a lot. We met briefly after he posted an advert in a Facebook group I help administer. I very politely pointed out that he was breaking the group rules and he might be told to go fuck himself by the other administrators. Unfortunately for me, I didn't realise I was dealing with Don Corleone himself. He sent me a lovely little essay to my inbox and insinuated I not tell anyone about the message or he might have them killed. So naturally I had to share it with the world. Merry Christmas. :-)

i used to play with Plasticine as a child. i never once got killed by it though. It tastes disgusting as well.

In this day and age of genderism and sexual equality, I think it's time I finally came out of the closet and admitted I am a sapiosexual. It means I'm attracted to intelligence. It's not just intelligence, a sense of humour is also a must. To be fair I think the two go hand in hand. A certain level of intelligence is needed for a good sense of humour. If anyone wants to try invading my inbox with the intention of striking a "sensible" conversation (i.e. not just wanting to cyber fuck my web browser) they need a sense of humour otherwise they are just wasting both our time.

Bit of a pretentious twat but at least he had the sense to give up.

It never ceases to amaze me just how persistent some of these inbox rapists can be. This guy is by no means the worst. A few months ago I played this game for over two months with a guy who refused to give up. In the end I had to block him from sending me messages because I was bored.

I'm sure that a small percentage of guys who send me unsolicited private messages are quite nice and probably just want to chat. The problem is that sometimes I'm just a bitch.

last week I had a lovely little conversation with an African man who wanted to comfort me after reading my post about setting fire to my boyfriend's ex girlfriends. He was a real sweetie. Well, I mean as sweet as an intellectually deranged Gambian scammer can be. He'd apparently heard of my home country "Durkastan" and generally talks a lot of nonsense so this week I thought I'd try making up a few words to see if he understood what I was talking about. He's doing quite well so far...